"Oh My Soul . . ."

Descending the stairs at a run, I slide into my flip-flops and dash for the closet to grab my warm brown jacket. Still pulling up the zipper, I join Mom at the door. She retrieves her purse and phone, and together we make our way outside. 
The car awaits us in the driveway, a royal coach on gravel. We get right in and start off. Mom cracks the window, and I plug in her phone so we can listen to some music. Otherwise, all is quiet for a while as we each sit back and relax. 
Soon, I notice Mom is taking us through a beautiful scenic route. Between tall, dipping hills that send my head spinning, I watch the trees and brush go by, colorful drops of green amidst a background of greyish clouds and light rain. And I'm once again swept into wonder at the works of our Creator. 
My ear picks up the words playing on the radio, and I recognize the song as an old favorite titled "Oh My Soul" from (guess who?) Casting Crowns.

Oh, my soul
Oh, how you worry
Oh, how you're weary, from fearing you lost control
This was the one thing, you didn't see coming
And no one would blame you, though
If you cried in private
If you tried to hide it away, so no one knows
No one will see, if you stop believing

Oh, my soul
You are not alone
There's a place where fear has to face the God you know
One more day, He will make a way
Let Him show you how, you can lay this down
'Cause you're not alone

Here and now
You can be honest
I won't try to promise that someday it all works out
'Cause this is the valley
And even now, He is breathing on your dry bones

I release a breath and take a moment to inwardly whisper, Thank You, Lord. Once again, He used something so simple like a drive, a view, and a song to give me a much-needed boost, a reminder that He's got this. Every bit of it.
Recently, COVID-19 has us all down. Tired. Stressed. Ready to get out, get away. Just be done with it all.
I don't know about you guys, but because of this I have been feeling very weary. This whole pandemic was indeed something I didn't see coming. I resent the new normal - face masks, closed doors, restrictions everywhere. Things just seemed to change overnight, and I don't like it. At all.
But, as God used this little road trip to remind me, the season of my life may have changed, but He still hasn't. The God who made all creation, the God Who is continuing to put breath in our lungs and a beat in our hearts, the God Who promised never to leave or forsake us . . .  is the same God Who reigns today. Nothing that happens in this life can ever change that.
And as hard as things may seem now, He has a plan. 
Mark Hall (lead singer of Casting Crowns and the author of the song I quoted above) wrote "Oh My Soul" during a trying time in his life, when he had just discovered he had cancer in one of his kidneys. It was a hard struggle for him, yet God used it to bring about a song that now, years later, is ministering to so many all around the globe. 
Including me.
We're not alone, and God is calling us to lay our burdens down at His feet. We're in the valley, and currently heading down a very windy, bumpy road, but soon we will enter glory, and all this pain will be forgotten. 
Don't lose heart, my friends. He is working in and at all moments of our lives. Trust Him, for He has promised to be our Peace. <3
Praying for each one of you!!

Blessings,

Ellen S.

Where Are We Turning?

Mom slips Ruby Jane into her bouncy seat and securely locks both buckles. 

I stand off to the side, watching. My littlest sister's eyelids begin to unfold, and I see the deep blue in her irises. She waves her hands in the air and grunts. The front of her too-big sleeper comes up into her face, and she opens her mouth, thinking she's been offered something to eat. When all that touches her lips is fabric and not milk, she raises a fist. First one, then two fingers into her mouth . . . Still nothing, and by now she's frustrated. Her face scrunches up, and she wails. Her belly craves something more, but she's unable to find what her body really needs. 
Sleepers and hands might work for a moment, but nothing can ever truly replace the warm, nourishing deliciousness of Mommy's milk. 
As I gaze upon this spectacle, and see Mom lift Ruby from her bouncy to feed her, my heart thrums. Aren't we all like this? Storms rise up in our lives, questions, doubts, fears . . . and we turn to the wrong things to fill us. We turn to people, books, money, on and on and on, any one thing we think might has the answers. 
We bury ourselves into substitutes, things that may work for a while but will never truly fill us. 
Jesus says He is the Well, the only One Who can heal us, restore us, and give us peace. Yet we grab our shovels and beat at the ground, digging our own wells . . . which quickly dry up, so that we draw only dust. 
We're never going to find peace this way. Our hearts will never be full. Our mouths will only get drier, our hearts emptier.
Friends, I urge you, whatever you may be dealing with today, take it to God. He knows you. He MADE you. He understands what you're going through, and He wants to help carry your burden. 

And if you're someone who has not yet asked Jesus into your heart, do so. Right now. You're never too far gone for Him. Ask Him in. Confess the wrong you've done and ask Him to make you new, and He will do it. Not only that, but He will flood you with indescribable joy and true fulfillment. 








Trust in Him at all times, O people; pour out your heart before Him; God is a refuge for us. PSALM 62:8

But for You, O LORD, do I wait; it is You, O LORD my God, Who will answer. PSALM 38:15

"Lord, Wherever You're Leading Me"

Ever feel like you have your future all planned out? Then, just like that, your plans crumble, and you're face-to-face with uncertainty? I'm sure we've all had those moments. 
The other night, God (once again) used my very most favorite band, Casting Crowns, to bless me . . . and this time with an old, old song that I've listened to many times before: "The Very Next Thing." Here's the line that jumped out at me, sending me scrambling for paper and a pen:

Lord, wherever You're leading me, that's where I want to be.

I wrote it out, added a favorite verse (Psalm 143:8), and hung it up on my wall to serve as a constant reminder.

He leads, I follow.

And in His presence there is fullness of joy. <3

Musing #104 - "What If I Gave Everything?" ~ Part 1

I sit down in my chair and reach for the speaker that sits on my desk. "You want some music?" I ask my one-year-old sister, who answers, "All 'ight!" I smile and press down on the button. A moment later, and the bluetooth speaker comes to life. I connect it with my device and click the Pandora icon. It isn't long before the music begins to slip through, starting with one of my favorites, "You Are Good" by Nichole Nordeman, and evenutally turning to a song by Casting Crowns that (believe it or not) I've never heard before called "What If I Gave Everything?" Interested, I perk my ears, and my sister begins to nod her head to the beat.
The words immediately catch me:

All my life I longed to be a hero
My sword raised high, running to the battle
I was gonna take giants down
Be a man you would write about
Deep in my chest, is the heart of a warrior

So why am I still standing here
Why am I still holding back, from You
I hear You call me out into deeper waters
But I settled on a shallow end
So why am I still standing here

I was so afraid, what it might cost to follow You
I'd walk by faith if I could, get these feet to move
But I don't wanna live that way
I don't wanna look back someday
On a life that never stepped across the line

So why am I still standing here
Why am I still holding back, from You
You've given me a faith, that can move a mountain
But I'm still playing in the sand

Building little kingdoms that will never stand
I hear You call me up, into deeper waters
But I settled on a shallow end (shallow end)
I'm so tired of standing here
What if I gave everything to You

What if I gave everything
What if I stopped holding back from You
Starting now, I'm stepping out onto deeper waters
What if I gave everything
What if I stopped holding back from You
Starting now, I'm stepping out onto deeper waters
I wanna see some mountains move

Ready to give everything
Say goodbye to standing here.

The song draws to a close, and, in response to the final verse, my sister crows, "G'bye!" I smile, still contemplating the words and how they apply to my life.
God used this song to show me two things, one of which I'll be sharing in this post. The second tidbit will be coming later (so be sure and keep an eye out for "What If I Gave Everything?" ~ Part 2).
As followers of Jesus, we're called to share the good news and spread the Gospel everywhere. As followers of Jesus, we're supposed to be brave and speak up for what's right. But as weak humans and vile sinners, we draw back, finding our seats on the "shallow end" of the ocean God is pulling us to, choosing instead to play in the "sand" - what's familiar, comfy, easy. 
We're holding back, holding on tight to the things that don't matter.
God never promised that being a Christian and telling others about Him would be easy, but He did promise that He would be with us through it all. 
And yet, when He nudges us to reach out to unbelievers, we plant our feet. We close our lips, clamp down on our calling. 
It's time to stop holding back. It's time to jump right into that deep water - time to share our faith, see mountains move. 
Are you ready to give everything? Say "goodbye" to standing here, and plummet forward?
Go ahead - He's got you.

Musing #95 - Let Go of the Doorknob

My mom and I were on our way back from a pleasant drive together. A cup of French vanilla iced coffee sat securely in its holder, reminding us of our stop at Dunkin' Donuts; in the trunk bags of fresh, crispy apples awaited the canning jars. Music slipped from the speakers, mixing with our voices.

Suddenly, we passed a billboard - a billboard whose words spoke in volumes to me. To paraphrase those words (as I don't remember them exactly): "God wants to open more doors in your life, so let go of the doorknob."

Mom smiled. "Let go of the doorknob," she repeated. "It reminds me of that story of the Israelites, how they didn't want to leave Egypt as they believed they were going to die in the wilderness."
Like always, Mom is right. The Israelites didn't trust God enough to loosen their hold on the "doorknob" and cheerfully follow Him wherever He led them. But also . . . Isn't it like me? Feeling comfy in the familiar, knowing where each day is going to find me. Then, suddenly, God is saying, "I've got something so much better in mind for you, but you have to be willing to move past your past, to trust Me and let Me guide you." 

It's hard at times. While God keeps giving me glimpses of all He has behind the doors that He's opening, there're times that I find myself doubting, wondering if it's worth it. Wondering what it would've been like if things had happened differently. Wondering why I can't go back.

Yet, you know what? I'm safe. I'm fine. No matter what happens, He's got me. And His plan is so much better than my own. 

It's time to uncurl my fingers from that doorknob, square my shoulders, and march boldly forward.

Because I am His, and I'm choosing, with His help and strength, to trust Him. Always. Fully.

He loves me, and He loves you. <3

Click this video to listen to "Already There" by Casting Crowns.

This song is amazingly good, and I pray God uses it to bless you as He did me. 

Musing #94 - You're His Princess

Princesses are sensitive. They feel things that average people don't feel. In other words, they're special.

Growing up, I heard this a lot. In Disney movies and "Max & Ruby" episodes, this is what I was told. And I always desired to be one of those "special princesses" - to be unique, one-of-a-kind. One morning, my older brother came into my room and asked if I'd felt the marble he'd placed beneath my mattress several nights before. Grinning, he displayed the glossy, round ball in his hand, and I insisted that I had felt a little something while lying in bed. Of course, if I had, it was probably only a spring in the mattress or something like that, but still . . . 
Now that I've grown older, I can look back at that time and smile, because, all this while, I was and am a princess - a beautiful princess, priceless in the King's eyes. And, truly, the realization has finally come - I do have feelings that average people don't experience. As a Christian, a daughter of the one true King, I've been blessed with a conscience, with a gift of knowing right from wrong. While I may not feel the marble beneath my mattress, I feel the fountain of joy in my heart from accepting the Lord as my Savior. While I may not hold the made-up feelings in all those TV shows, I hold a greater gift - Jesus' love, and that in me makes me aware of the souls around me in need of Him, as well as take notice of the pricks of guilt that sear me should I wander from His path. 
And you know what? If you've accepted Christ into your life and surrendered yourself to Him, you, too, are a princess. A beautiful princess whose worth is never taken for granted by her King. 
To quote the words of an author friend:
You. Are. Beloved.

"For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to seperate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord." ROMANS 8:38-39 

Musing #86 - Call Upon Him

So many lessons can be learned from a girl who has not yet seen her second birthday! 
Recently, my little sister has figured out how to say my name . . . sort of. In sweet baby accents, she sings out, "Eh-yee!" - her form of my nickname, "Ellie." My name is the one that seems to come most readily to her lips, even more than "ma-ma" (shh . . . please don't tell my mom I said that!). Whenever my sister spills a cup, gets a dab of oatmeal on her finger, or wants to go outside, it's "Eh-yee! Eh-yee!" And there are times, even, when she says my name for no apparent reason at all, but just because she wants my attention, or because she wants to show me something she's proud of or puzzled over. Her love and devotion for me is obvious - it's unarguable.
So . . . why am I sharing all this? Well, one reason is for my sisterly pride, but . . . *clears throat* No, the real reason I'm sharing this is because I want to remind us all of something.
And that is that we are like little toddlers, just learning to speak, excited over every little discovery, agonized in every crisis, and longing for attention - each time knowing that all we have to do is cry out, "Father!" and He hears us. In fact, we don't have to say anything at all before He knows. He knows our thoughts, our circumstances, our everything. It's all in His hands.
He is right here, right beside us, all the time - seeing, knowing, and hearing.

All we have to do is trust in Him.
And now I must go, for once again I'm being summoned by my sweet sister. 😊

It is my prayer that each of you has this hope within your hearts. If you're reading this post and you're unsure of who God is, who you are in Him, or anything along those lines, don't hesitate to drop a comment. I'd love to converse further with you and perhaps, with God's help, lead you to the path of true peace and joy. ❤
Don't ever forget: you are LOVED. 
Loved beyond all comprehension. 

Musing #80 - God is Good

I kiss Mom good-bye and slip into my family's garage, my heart light with the prospect of enjoying another long, pleasant walk through the neighborhood. In one easy motion I slide my feet into a pair of flip-flops and start out.

Ah, yes. As I exit the garage, thrill shoots through me. I might take my walks daily, in the same areas each time, but somehow it just never grows old. The beauty of God's creation is always there.

Musing #58 - So Much Beauty Around Us, and Yet . . .

Click.
The sound of the buckle fastening securely around my sister's legs nearly always brings a sparkle to her big, dark eyes. Not today. Although her cries stop, no smile enters her face.
As soon as I get her out in the fresh air, she'll be fine, I think, and, wrapping my fingers about the handles of the stroller, I proceed to do just this.
But the baby isn't in an amiable attitude today; rather, she acts moody and upset, and after only a few minutes of walking she again begins to wail. I can't understand it. The beauty around us is so breathtaking and amazing, and because of this both my sister and I usually find our walks together to be immensely enjoyable. Around my feet the ants and beetles are skittering, and above us the sky is a gorgeous blue. The trees growing by the sidewalk provide not only shade, but also display an astonishing array of bright-green leaves. Flowers of various sorts are a sight to behold.
And yet, even with all this, my sister finds a reason to cry? 
As I take my sister out of her stroller, place her on my hip, and prepare to one-handedly push the stroller back home, I start to muse. 
My sister's attitude reminds me of . . . myself.
God sometimes places me in very trying situations, during which I cry and beg to be allowed to be delivered from it all. Then He shows me Himself - Who He is, what He is doing, and what He has in mind for me. 
The beauty is revealed to me, but I pay little attention, as I am too busy keeping my eyes on the ashes I've experienced.
You might be struggling with this very same thing. Or you could be noticing the work God is doing, yet the burden is so crushing you hardly care. Perhaps you're wondering, "Is it worth it?"
But I'm here to tell you: YES, it is worth it!!!!!
There's no trial so heavy that God can't use it for your good and His glory.
Trust Him, for oh, how much we miss out on when we focus only upon our misery, and not upon Him and what He is doing in our lives! 

This makes up my discussion for my most recent memory verse, Jeremiah 29:11. 

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD. 

"Plans to prosper you and not to harm you,

plans to give you hope and a future."

If you would like to read my latest review for the Elsie Dinsmore series of books, go HERE. Please be aware that it might be my last review for a while . . . 

Musing #49 - Go to the Ant!

  Have you ever closely observed an ant? They're hard-working little creatures, and they persevere no matter what the circumstances. That's no doubt why the Proverbs tell us, "Go to the ant, O sluggard; consider her ways, and be wise." (Proverbs 6:6) 
  However, there's more we can learn from the ant than just this.

Musing #40 - Shelter from the Storm

  How God has been teaching me lessons from the rain He has so graciously created!
  Last week's post talked about my little birdie-friend and how he had the joy and strength needed to sing, even amidst his affliction. Today, still another amazing truth was revealed to me.

Musing #39 - Joyful Under Affliction

  As I was sitting in my bedroom this morning, my pencil busy at work upon the pages of my notebook, a sound came from outside my window - a sound that seems to always fill me with joy and peace. 

Musing #32 - A Little Note of Encouragement

Hi, friends! I was recently given a very precious piece of my mother's work - the hymn and sweet lettering found in the above picture.

Musing #30 - I Have To . . . Or I Get To?

A valuable lesson for each and every one of us to learn is the power of "perspective." As we attend those dull, daily duties of every day life, we may tend to grumble and feel that life is just plain . . . unfair. 
"I have to wash these dishes."
"I have to clean this table."
"I have to sweep this floor."
. . . and on and on the list goes.

Musing #28 - Where Your Identity is Found

  Hi, friends! How are you all this fine February day?
  Did my post title give you a little surprise? This post is surprising to me, too . . . one I fully hadn't intended on writing, but God can reveal Himself in the most mysterious of ways, and I feel that I should share this little experience with you :-).